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    Please ensure that ladies and men are tatooed all over and make sure that you have an abundance of England football regalia, hats, shirts, shorts and the omnipresent towel with Wayne Rooney's ugly mug on.

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    The whole south coast of Goa is a string of spectacular beaches and lovely towns, such as Udupi on the Karnataka coast. Inland is the historical site Hampi (railway station at Hospet). The main transport hub for south Goa is Margao (also known as Marmagao) which is called Madgoan by the railway.

    Take a train to Hampi or Madgoan but be aware that most trains leave early in the morning (e.g. to Hospet - Hampi at 7 am) so it’s good to stay somewhere close to the station. We found the best place was Kovolam Beach which has lots of guesthouses and restaurants and a nice beach, and it’s cheap.

    Some advice: Don't catch the state bus from Goa to Hampi - it's 10 hours of sheer hell.

    south Goa

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    It is living on its reputation from the 80s. The beaches are full of self-serving hedonists looking for the perfect party and the DJs are awful. Panjim is the worst city I've ever been to in India. A 3rd rate Portuguese colonial town which is incredibly run down. Kerala is much more laid back, has better beaches and hasn't thousands of short haul tourists following the rave trail. The Keralans are much more friendly and not as money grabbing as the Goans.

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