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The ultimate city
Statue of Liberty on a stormy night


"New York is like disco, but without the music," Elaine Stritch.

New York is the ultimate city. If you like noise, social chaos, racial diversity, anonymity, shopping, concrete, cultural overload, attitude, traffic, linguistic mayhem, huge buildings and little dogs, then you will love New York. It has the best and worst of any urban space. Its best is terrific and its worst is fascinating. If you hate cities then don't come to New York; if you love them, you won't want to leave. There is of course more to the city than that. From the broadwalk on Brighton Beach to the vast expanse of Central Park, there are vast swaths of the city where calm reigns.

But it is the mixture of hustle and sensitivity that keep the wheels of the city turning that are most endearing. The sound of car horns ricocheting off the Midtown skyscrapers, young men rapping in the subway, old women sharing jokes in Russian or the sound of singing from Haitian store front churches on Sunday morning. The museums, shows and sites are, of course wonderful. But it is the patchwork of human activity that goes on around them that transforms New York from a noun to a verb.
Best view
Empire State Building
But to make it worth your while you should go first thing on a weekday - it opens at 9.30am. Otherwise you'll spend half a day in the queue and be so cheesed off you won't care what you see by the time you get to the top.

350 Fifth Avenue, Manhattan; www.esbnyc.com/

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Best thing to do for free
Staten Island Ferry
A great view of the Manhattan skyline and the Statue of Liberty. Unless there's a minor league baseball game on the island (which does cost) then just turn around, come right back and enjoy the view all over again.

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Where to watch the world go by
Washington Square Park
Along with the chess players and the students there was for the longest time a man who seemed to hug people for living.

West 4th Street and MacDougal; www.pps.org/gps/one?public_place_id=7

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Nighttime hangout
Cielo
Despite the incongruous ski chalet feel to a place in the heart of the Meatpacking district it has a great dance floor and a great sound - mixture of house and techno. Trendy, but not too trendy. Glam, but not too sparkly.

18 Little W 12th St, New York; Tel: (212) 645-5700// www.cieloclub.com/

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Cultural highlight
The Metropolitan Museum of Art
Despite the recent reopening of Moma in all its splendour, the Met still wins out. Like any huge museum of this kind - it is has seven major, permanent collections - you won't see it all. If you have the stamina put aside a day, go early, take a break and go back for more. If not then it makes sense to focus on what piece of candy in this particularly huge store you want and then try not to binge.

1000 Fifth Avenue at 82nd Street; Tel: 212-535-7710; www.metmuseum.org/

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Bring back
An iPod
Or two, so long as the exchange rate is generous.

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Leave there
9/11 memorabilia
Don't buy any 9/11 memorabilia - it honours the tacky, not the dead.

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Time for love
Brooklyn Promenade
At night, with a terrific view of the Manhattan skyline.

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Best-kept secret (till now)
New York city
New York is made up five boroughs. But when visitors arrive they mistake Manhattan between Battery Park and 96th street for the entire city. Don't get me wrong. Manhattan from the neck down is great. But try the amateur night at the Apollo in Harlem, Williamsburg or Fort Greene in Brooklyn or the Bronx zoo. Take a bridge or a tunnel. Get out and see the city.

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The thing to eat
Knish
This is baked or fried dough stuff with meat, potatoes or cheese. Yiddish and yummy, though you may feel you have swallowed a breeze block. Go to Yonah Schimmel's Knish Bakery on Houston.

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Green space
Central Park
Nothing beats Central Park. You can rollerblade, row, jog, visit the zoo, stroll, see Shakespeare or just disappear. I've strolled and disappeared but I've heard the other stuff is lovely.

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Best ride
The Circle Line ferry
From Pier 83 at West 42nd street and 12th avenue. You can forget that Manhattan is an island, this trip takes you round it on water giving you a sense of how it all fits together. The two-hour semi-circle tour for around $12 is plenty.

www.circleline42.com/

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Escape the crowds
Go back to Kansas, Dorothy
If you want to escape the crowds, you're in the wrong city.

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The film to see before I go
Mad Hot Ballroom
A fun documentary about three high schools who enter a ballroom dancing competition.

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... and the novel to read
Paul Auster's The New York Trilogy
Auster arranges much that is weird and wonderful about the city around the template of a thriller in three parts.

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Where to eat (budget)
Veselka
A terrific Ukrainian diner in the east village, which is open all night on Fridays and Saturdays. Fantastic broccoli and cheese pirogis and mushroom and barely soups; blintzes sure to ensure that you die happy from heart failure. And the best burgers in the city.

9th street and second avenue: Subway F, V to second avenue, R, W to 8th st, 6 to Astor Place; www.veselka.com/.

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Where to eat (moderate)
Joe's Shanghai
Don't be put off by the queue outside this Chinatown favourite on most weekend evenings. Parties of four or less usually get seated within half and hour and it's worth the wait. Unless you're unlucky you share a large round table with others - a brilliant way to meet strangers who aren't strange. Its soup dumplings are a must. The soup is in the dumplings; getting it out without getting it all over you demands finesse. Cash only.

9 Pell St, Chinatown, subways 6,W, Q to Canal St

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Where to eat (posh)
Locanda, Vini e Olii
Cross the Bridge to Brooklyn for a fantastic Italian meal in a spectacular venue. Locanda has maintained the look of the old-fashioned pharmacy that was once here but made it the home to a slow food movement, so arrive early and dig in for a long, delicious Italian experience. Each course arrives as its own separate dish - if you're doing it in style you can have five small ones. The menu, which the eccentric owner will gladly explain to you, includes Goose prosciuttio starter, wild boar main course and a range of exotica from Chestnut Lasagnette to Parsley Fazolettini. Have wine and don't expect to leave with much change out of $50 a head, if that.

Subway C train to Clinton/Washington; www.locandavinieolii.com/

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Where to stay (budget)
The Chelsea Star
New York doesn't really do budget when it comes to hotels. Your best bet is to go online and see if you can bid for something cheap. Otherwise at $99 the Chelsea Star is about the cheapest you'll find before you get into hostels and shared toilets.

300 W 30th Street 8th Ave; (212) 244-STAR [7827]; www.starhotelny.com/

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Where to stay (moderate)
Mayfair New York Hotel
A boutique hotel in Midtown that you could emerge from with change out of $200.

242 West 49th St; Tel: 212 586 030; www.mayfairnewyork.com/

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Where to stay (posh)
Trump Towers
Sod it. If you're going to break the bank, you might as well have a laugh doing it. At around $700 a night you'll need a sense of humour. Right on top of Central Park, it is in a great location. There are nicer hotels, I'm told, but none that give you quite so many bragging rights.

One Central Park West New York; Tel: 212 299 1000; www.trumpintl.com/

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Find out what's on
Time Out
Get Time Out from any kiosk and most newsagents or the Village Voice.

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Get there from the airport
Airport transfer: take a cab
From JFK to Manhattan a cab is by far the easiest and costs $50 with a tip. At $5 the subway is by far the cheapest. But after an eight-hour flight, an hour in immigration and a five-hour time difference the shuttle to the station and then a 40-minute trip into town, plus maybe a change or two, can be gruelling. Best bet is probably an express bus, which goes every 15-30 minutes and costs $15. If you're going to Brooklyn or Queens it might make more sense to get a cab.

From Newark get the train to Penn station, which runs every 15 minutes and costs $14. A cab will set you back $60 with toll and tip and not get you back any quicker.

Above all, never expect to hail a cab in Manhattan from 3pm to 5pm - they are changing shifts. Their lights are off and nobody's going home.

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